The Last Time I cry
by Minastauriel o' Eryn Lasgalen
Summary: My Twist on the Bartowski's wedding day with many unexpected twists.    I do not own chuck but I wish i did.  First in my series of oneshots: Running back to you.


The Last Time I Cry

Disclaimer: I dont own Chuck but maybe when I a billionare...

My Dramatic spin on Chucks wedding with several surprises added kiwi style.

Chuck's POV

I can see the rows of people waiting and I know that its gonna happen soon. The moment that I've been waiting for ever since I first laid eyes on her. If only she was here with me now, to calm the nerves. She always had this sense of control about her, this calm that came from years of her feild experiance as a spy. Even through the years of killing and deception, she still could maintain a normal, even happy vibe that brought peace to everyone around her. I wish with every fibre of my being that she could be here to hold my hand through this (metaphorically of course).

I look down at my feet and close my eyes. _Stay cool Chuck. Dont freak out. _That's exactly what she would say.

The band starts to play and I look up. There she is.

Sarah.

The most beautiful woman I have ever known. _God, she looks good today. _I dont know what I am drawn to first. The perfect shade of cerulean in her eyes or the way that she smiles in that knowing way. Our eyes meet as she walks toward the alter and I know I'm the luckiest guy in the world.

Sarah's POV

I dont know what to feel. In all of my years as a spy I was never taught how to be normal. My instructors would say that emotions got you killed, to lock 'em up and throw away the key. I was told that if I ever connected with someone that it could kill us both. They taught me to be like marble,cold and beautiful. To remain distant and reclusive and it worked for years, until I met Chuck. That was the missing link in all of my training. There was no 'How-to-not-fall-in-love-for-dummies'. He understood me like noone else and from day 1 he started peeling back the layers of lies and deceit. I was sucked in so deep that no matter how much I tried, I couldn't pull back. After a while I stopped trying and let him love me. I knew however, that I would never be free to love him back, there would always be something in the way.

And even now as I'm walking down the isle to the man of my dreams, the ominous feeling that something might happen still plagues me. So much has happened in the past few days, even. I was nearly killed by Vivian and that God-damned Norseman device, she nearly killed Chuck in Russia and we were fired from the CIA. I want so much for this day to be perfect, I've been waiting for so long. I'm so caught up in my thoughts that I dont notice the gasps of the crowd as a man in black enters the church, takes aim, and fires.

A single shot rings out followed by two more. The man falls dead to the ground.

Panicked, I turn to Chuck just in time to hear him scream my name before my world turns black.

Chuck's POV

The shrouded man quickly drops as Casey fires two shots from his 9mm but I barely notice. All I can see is the crimson rose blossoming right in the middle of Sarah's left shoulder.

"SARAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Ellie's POV

Ambulance

"Keep pressure on the wound Chuck."

I can hardly believe it. On his wedding day, the day we'd been secretly planing for two years now, he faces the pain of losing her.

"Please, Sarah, come on baby. Dont die on me now", he begs her.

Chuck loves her more than life itself and I'll be damned if I let her die now.

"ELLIE, SHE'S NOT BREATHING!"

"I NEED OXYGEN S.T.A.T!"

"Yes Doctor"

"She's flat-lining. Prep for De-Fib!"

"Ellie, whats happening!"

"Charging to 200"

"Clear"

And I see my brother, tears streaming down his face, watching his fiancée convulse as 200 volts of electricity course through her veins. _Dont you dare die Sarah Walker or there will be no place in heaven or hell safe enough for you._

Chuck's POV

Im sitting outside the ER and all I can do is pray. Pray that Sarah will be okay and that Casey killed the bastard who shot her. The same image plays in my head over and over. Sarah's pinicked expression and the crimson rose that blossomed over the white silk of her dress. Why did this happen to her? The most beautiful person in the world. I nearly lost her once and I dont want to go down that road again.

I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket. Casey.

*sniff sniff* "Hello"

_"Bartowski?"_

"Yeah"

_"Hows Walker doing?"_

"She's in surgury now. I nearly lost her in the ambulance and I haven't seen or heard anything since I got here."

_"How are you holding up?"_

"How the hell do you think I'm holding up Casey! The person I love most is dying for the second time this week and this time there is no antidote, no intersect to help me save her!"

_"*grunt*"_

"Is there something you need to tell me because I'm not in the mood for your sarcastic throat clearing."

_"I got an I.D on the shooters body. Your'e not gonna like it."_

"Who?"

_"Daniel Shaw."_

"What?"

_"I managed to get in contact with some of my old NSA contacts. Turns out Shaw escaped a maximum security prison in the middle of the desert and came straight to Burbank. He's been looking for you and Walker since he escaped. Saw your engagement in the paper and planned his assult for your wedding day. He got time and place from a couple of Buy-Morons."_

"But he's dead now right?"

_"*grunts* Yeah. But he wasn't alone in this assult Chuck. Looks like some of his old ring contacts in LA heard he was in town and gave him a job. They've been regrouping right under our noses."_

"What kind of gear do we have left. I know the CIA took most our our equipment and stripped Castle but..."

_"Yeah I got guns Bartowski. What do you have in mind?"_

"Tonight we are gonna break in and kill the bastards who tried to kill Sarah. Im gonna need all of the ordinance you have for this mission."

_"What about Sarah? You should be here with her if she wakes up from this."_

"Casey, I have to do this. Are you in or not?"

_"I'm in."_

Casey's POV:That Night, Ring Compound.

I can understand why Bartowski is pissed. The guy has tried to kill Sarah three times now and he might have finally succeeded. Part of me hates this side of Chuck, cold and distant. It's not who he really is but it's this side of him that might save his life tonight. Since he had the intersect removed again he's been really worried but I see no trace of that anxiety in the spy that sits beside me now.

"Are you ready Casey?"

"You sure you wanna be here Bartowski? Your not the spy you used to be without the interect. You're gonna get yourself killed."

"And it wont matter anyway. I have nothing left without Sarah. Nothing else matters now but avenging her."

"You're talking like she's gone already. She might pull through. And what about Ellie, Devon, Clara and Morgan? They all need you. Your being selfish Chuck. Walker wouldn't want you to destroy your family over her and you know it."

"Look Casey, I talked to Ellie before I left, okay? She told me the odds. I cant live without Sarah and I cant live knowing that the Ring is back hunting my family. I'm doing this for my family and I'm doing this for me. So answer me straight just once. Are you ready?"

"Hell yeah"

_'I gotta hand it to him, he's a fighter' _I think as we break down the door, encountering several enemy agents.

"Chuck, GET DOWN!"

Sarah's POV

My world is filled with darkness. I shouldn't be here, wherever here is. I should be with Chuck. _Where is he?_

"Sarah?"

That voice...

"Sarah?"

"Ellie?"

"Open your eyes Sarah"

_God it's bright! _And there's Ellie standing over me with that worried sister look on her face.

"Ellie, where am I?"

"You're in the hospital", she frowns.

"What happened?"

"You cant remember?"

I shake my head. "I was at my wedding, walking down the isle and.." I try to sit up.

"Oh GOD THAT HURTS! What the hell happened to me?"

"It would be best for you if you keep lying down. This is all Chuck told me."

And I sit wide eyed as she explains that I was shot in my left shoulder by a masked individual who was quickly dispatched by Casey. She tells me about the trip to the hospital and my near death and about the surgury to repair my heart.

"Im fairly confident that you will make a full recovery."

Yeah thats great but she's avoiding the topic of where Chuck is.

"Oh he told me one more thing that he thought you may need to know if you woke up."

_This had better be where Chuck is or I will strangle someone. I'm supposed to be on a plane heading for fucking Rome right now!_

"What is it?"

"The guy who attacked you, was your ex. Daniel Shaw."

"WHAT!" I sit bold upright sending searing pain through my body.

"Sarah, calm down or I'll have to sedate you. You nearly died okay? You cant be moving around to much."

Frustrated, I ease myself back to lying down.

"Daniel Shaw sabotaged my wedding! Oh my God is Chuck okay? Was he hurt?"

"Chuck was fine last I saw him Sarah. He didn't stick around but he left me a note"

_Ellie,_

_I'm going on one last mission and I may not survive. The intersect which gave me my strength has been lost and I'm just me without it. I want you to know how much I love you and Clara and Awesome. Just in case._

_I'm gonna find the sonofabitch that did this to Sarah, whatever it takes. If Sarah survives and I dont, tell her how much I love her and take care of her for me. _

_Dont worry too much Ell. _

_I brought Casey with me._

_Chuck_

"Oh my God, Chuck! He's going to get himself killed and it's all because of me!"

"Sarah please. Chuck wouldn't want you to get like this and I dont want you leaving to save his arse either. Superspy or not, you nearly died today and its not just you that would be getting killed."

_Ummm... What the hell is she talking about?_

"Ellie, what are you talking about?"

"You're pregnant Sarah"

"What?"

_What?_

Chuck's POV:Ring Headquaters

_How many fricking spys are in this joint? _Casey and I dive for cover as we are fired apon by enemy agents. I count 5 bad guys and signal Casey.

_5 enemies. Move now!_

We fire on the enemy agents. I cap two, Casey three. More come down the corridor and we continue to fire in short bursts. My pocket is vibrating. Who would call me now?

"Chuck! Your phone's ringing!"

"I'm a little busy right now Casey"

"It could be Ellie. Take it, I'll cover you."

"Hello"

_"Chuck?"_

"Sarah?"

_"It's me Chuck"_

"Oh my God, honey, are you okay?"

_"I'll be fine Chuck but you need to get out of there, it's way too dangerous!"_

"I cant Sarah. I'm so close to finding the bastard that ordered our deaths and I cant stop until I do."

_"Chuck please."_

"Just stay in the hospital okay? You will be safe there and when I get out of here I'll come straight to you okay baby? I promise."

_"NO GOD DAMMIT! Chuck I will not have our baby grow up without her father!"_

_Did she say Baby?_

"What!"

_"I'm pregnant Chuck"_

"I'm gonna be a Dad?"

_"Yes Chuck, now please come back"_

"I'll try Sarah, I'll try"

Sarah's POV

_"I'll try Sarah, I'll try."_

_"BARTOWSKI, GRENADE! RUUUU..."_

The line cut off.

"CHUCK! Can you hear me? Chuck!"

"Sarah calm down."

"No Ellie, I will not calm down! Chuck is dead" I brake down in tears. I knew he was dead. How could he not be. And the worst part is that it was all my fault. My call had ended his life.

"Why Chuck! Why did you leave!" I dont stop wailing until the sedative induced blackness takes me away.

I swore that day never to love another man again.

Eight and a Half Months Later.

_Notice of Birth_

_At midnight on 10th April _

_at Saint Josephs Medical Center,_

_To Sarah Walker_

_And Charles Bartowski (deceased)_

_A beautiful daughter, Charlotte Samantha_

_Sarah also wishs it to be known that her daughter_

_Charlotte Samantha will be honouring her fathers name of _

_Bartowski._

When our daughter came into the world, my life changed forever. Chuck was gone and I couldn't change that but holding his baby in my arms was like having him back with me again. She had her fathers brown curls and his laughing eyes. I cried that day. I cried for my lost love who was taken from me too soon. And I cried in thanks of this little piece of my Chuck that was mine to keep safe in my heart for eternity.

That was the last time I cried.


End file.
